I am going through a lot of conflicting thoughts right now. Ever since Chris and I moved out on our own we have really wanted a puppy to care for. Chris has had many pets while growing up who he was very close to. I had many pets as well but I think it was hard for me to get close to them because we never had them for very long.
I have been typing the next few lines over & over again just to delete them in the end. So I’m just going to be honest here — I feel so guilty. Here I am talking about getting a dog while there are two sitting at my grandmother’s house that could really use a better home. I get so sad when I see them in the back yard with hardly any room to run around and no one to play with. It’s heart-wrenching.
But here’s the problem– I want a puppy. I’d like to have one as a baby who I can watch grow up. I feel terrible.. and very conflicted. Chris and I also talked about adopting one from a shelter as well which is wonderful. But then again.. I want a puppy. It’s a terrible thought and I feel awful. As you can see I’m worried what’s the right thing to do. Should we adopt and give a dog a new & happy home? Should we adopt my grandmother’s dogs? Or buy a puppy? The hard thing about my grandmother’s dogs are that they are loud and rambunctious and I worry about how that will be in our apartment — we live on the second floor mind you.
I’m watching an episode on Animal Planet about a year old lab who has been in a shelter her whole life. She is such a gorgeous dog but no one has taken her in because she has a injured and deformed foot. It’s so sad.. I’m about in tears thinking about what that poor dog had to endure. With the help from the Underdog to Wonderdog team a family was found for the dog and it warmed my heart to know this.
Through out all these conflicting thoughts — in the end I just want a dog to care for. I truly see them as living beings with feelings, with love and with a heart. They deserve a good family just like any child would. I am really looking forward to having a dog to love.. I just need to decide on which path to take.
Get the right dog to suit your needs. Apartment dogs need to be mute and docile. a fifteen year old lab might do the trick. Or, you can get a puppy (or youngster) from the shelter and can then apply your maternal instincts to it from its infancy.
If you take on a dog for good reasons that you don't really want, you may end up resenting it even though your heart was in the right place, the dog may not be.
www.dogbreedinfo.com/search.htm is a good place to match you with a dog breed that is suitable for you in your current lifestyle and living quarters.
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Uncle Scott and Aunt Valerie
Hi, Scott! Thanks so much for the advice. You're right, I have to do what I feel is right and what I won't resent later on. Deep down.. I know I really want to adopt a puppy. Whether from a family or a shelter. I just want one to love. :) I just have to change my mind set and try not to feel so guilty for not rescuing one.
Oh, I love those websites! I have used a few of those in the past few days. I really have done my research. :)
We love Judy to pieces and I couldn't imagine our days without her antics and cuddles. I've told Sarah that I want another to keep her company and also because Judy is pretty much exclusively Sarah's dog and I'd like a buddy myself:P
I've looked into it because I wanted to adopt this time and there are hundreds of rescue clubs out there for specifically devoted to rescuing puppies from " puppy mill" breeders. I think that is the route I am going to go. I don't think it's selfish to say you want a puppy. Your grandmother's dog's are not your responsibility...... If you feel badly about them advise her to find them a better home or find them one yourself but your situation wouldn't be any better than what they now.
A couple excellent breeds are ....
Obviously miniature Dachshunds:P
Shih tzus........ Don't be intimidated by the Hair do.... My family owned 4 of them over a period of 15 years ( all named Teddy.... even the girl that my parents tried to pass off as a boy after the second Teddy died)and they are some of the sweetest and smartest dogs. They also don't shed at all due to the fact they have actual Hair and not fur.
Do alot of research Trina..... Don't go to the shelter and fall for the first terrier that gives you the Doe Eyes... It need to be a low energy / small apartment dog.
The nice things about those rescue organizations is that they usually put you through a very rigorous interview process which really helps you appreciate adopting and saving that dog from something.... and it's still a PUPPY:P
It's so funny that you mentioned shitzus.. those are the dogs my grandmother has. They are such wonderful and gorgeous dogs but hers are totally outside dogs. And believe it or not I am really considering getting a dachshund. I have been reading up on them and their personalities and I think one would be perfect for Chris and I. Plus they are so darn cute! One of my neighbors have one that looks so much like Judy, it's crazy.
So I have been readings magazines and books on different dog breeds. I have even read up on some websites and did those "The perfect breed for you" quizzes. I'm really going to put a lot of thought in to this as I don't want to rush through it and get whatever cute dog I happen to come across.
I've been thinking about it a lot lately and even talked it over with Chris. I think I'm just going to get a puppy -- my heart has been sent on getting one and I feel as though it's the right thing to do. There are so many rescue houses out here that I happened to stumble upon. I found their website and were able to search through their puppies and they have SO many adorable dachshunds with papers/shots and everything. :) I am so excited.
I would have said have your grandmothers dogs and a puppy, or have a puppy after them, but if they're excitable now they'll likely be more so given free reign of your apartment. Could you perhaps, once you have your own dog, take them for walks together?
If you got a puppy from a shelter you'd be doing both the things you want, getting the age you want whilst helping a dog in need.
I don't know why I didn't think of this before! I love the idea of having them all play together or taking them all on walks. :) I will do that. Thanks!
I actually came across a few animal rescue places where they give away dogs of all ages. They had quite a few puppies so it's nice knowing I always have that option -- I believe it's what my husband and I have decided to do. I can not wait!
I don't think there is anything wrong with wanting a puppy!! It's a normal thing and I think that you should consider at least going around looking at some puppies. It couldn't hurt, right? I understand that it is difficult because of the other dogs but other people had some good ideas like taking the puppy to play with the other dogs or taking them on walks together. Great ideas!
Thanks, Caity! Every time I think about one day having a puppy I get this huge smile on my face. :) It's so funny that all of a sudden, sometime last year, I got this huge urge to have a dog. Hell, I was even going to settle for a hamster or something for the time being. I think that since I still have a few years until I want to start a family, I figured the best way to share my love is to get a puppy. :) I absolutely can not wait. I keep bugging Chris about it -- I want one now! :P But we have to wait 'til more towards the end of the year. It's just too far away! hehe
And I love the idea of having our dog pay with my grandmothers. This makes me happy. :)
There is nothing wrong with wanting a puppy! I think you need to weigh up the pros and cons. If you did adopt your grandmothers, as you said they are loud and you live in an apartment building, if you had a puppy they would grow up in an apartment so you could train the puppy to it's conditions. With a shelter dog I guess it can go either way as all sorts of dogs end up there. But if you did get a sheltered dog and they are ill there are added medical costs in that. I guess it is all about what you feel most comfortable and what you can afford. Like the others have said you can take them all on walks together so the other dogs get out more :)
Great advice, Alice. Thank you! I have really been doing my research lately as I don't want to rush through this. My sister has gotten so many dogs because they were cute rather than their personalities and how well they would be in her apartment -- and she never had them longer than a few months. It was so sad!
People make fun of me because I research & read reviews on just about any thing I buy. I think when buying a pet, research & like you said, weighing the pros and cons, is only right.
I have been thinking a lot about it and I'm quite sure we've decided to adopt a puppy. We're still deciding which breed is the best for us.. but I'm leaning more towards a dachshund. :D
The good thing about getting a puppy is that you really do get the whole "puppy" experience with the training and watching them grow up, like you said. This could also be considered a "bad thing" I guess, depending on who you ask and what housebreaking horror stories they have!
I think you can do your part, like others have said, by socializing your grandma's dogs with your new animal friend. It would be good for all of them and you would feel like you're positively impacting their lives as well. :)
There's nothing wrong with wanting a puppy of your own because it is a fun experience. Either way, you're bringing joy to a dog's life-- no matter the circumstances.
You might be able to find a puppy at an animal shelter and sometimes they will even have already done the vaccinations and neutering. I would explore both options and just see who you "meet".
With our situation, we agreed that we were going to get a Westie puppy and then when we saw Liam in a store and interacted with him and we just instantly fell for the little guy. I couldn't leave at the end of the night knowing he would sit there and have people take him out and play with him and not take him home. So...we took him home, haha.
You will know what you want to do after you get out there and start to interact with some of the little ones to see who would be a right fit for you and Chris. :)
Aww, I love the story of you two meeting Liam. It's so sweet! I feel as though that is what most likely will happen to Chris and I when we go to adopt a puppy. I'm sure there will be one there that will totally stand out & match our personalities. :) I can not wait to start looking! I am so eager to wrap my arms around a puppy, it's so weird because I have never had that feeling before -- well, not this strong, lol.
I love your little Liam -- he's so damn cute! I get so happy every time I see that you're blogged about him. I never get tired of it. :D
We bought our dog at a pet store, but she is not a purebred dog. She is a cocker spaniel/blue heeler and I love her to death, but.... Jamie and I got her when we were still dating. She had to go live with his parents, then my parents, and Thank God, she is now with us. Looking back, I feel like we definitely should have waited and researched more. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't trade Daisy for anything, but it was not good for her to be living with someone else and barely seeing us. Also, we probably would have researched breeds more. I know a lot about dogs, but not every breed, lol. I didn't really know anything about blue heelers and she has definitely inherited some of that breed's traits. It would have been beneficial for both us and her to know some of that beforehand. So, definitely do the research.
About adopting...Our cat, Dinah, was rescued from someone that really did not need her. She was a little bitty kitten at the time. She was also VERY sick. It was really touch and go for a while on whether she would make it. But because we took her in, she is now a quite plump BEAUTIFUL cat. She is rotten. BUT, I really don't think she would have lived. So, I have dealt with both sides. Buying and adopting/rescuing.
Regardless of whether you buy one or adopt one it needs to be one that is good for you and this time in your life. So, really your grandma's dogs would not be the best option for your apartment.
Back when Jamie and I were both working we had a little inside dog too, but she was not the best fit for us. Or rather, we weren't for her. She needed someone home with her way more than we were. She was so stressed because we led very busy lives and were gone a lot. It was so hard to give her up, but it was best. We found a little old lady to take her in. But, I wrote that to say, that those are some things to take into consideration...
The next animal we get will be adopted (I have already picked where too :p ).
Hope all this rambling helps....Love you and miss you!!!
Aww, I love you too! Thanks for stopping by and giving me so much wonderful advice. :) I wasn't aware you two had a dog, how sweet! I have always believed it's important to do your research before getting a pet -- maybe it's because I have so many people buy a dog because it's cute rather whether or not they are the right dog for them. It's sad because they normally wind up giving them away out of frustration -- I don't want to do that! So Chris and I have been researching a lot. I have always wanted a husky but that's going to have to wait until we have a house and a nice yard. :P Until then, we're settling on a small dog. I absolutely can not wait until we go out and look around and see what's out there. :)
I have been thinking about my grandmother's dogs quite a lot and even though I know it's not really possible for me take them in right now -- I'm always going to feel guilty, it's just the way I am. But like others have suggested I can always take my puppy over there and let them all play together. :)
We are most likely going to adopt a puppy. I found this wonderful website with soo many dogs to choose from. They all have little stories about themselves -- it's so wonderful. I love browsing through them all. :)
Trina...I actually thought about your desire for a dog this weekend. Chris will remember Midnite. She was mixed with a weiner dog (dachsund hound) and she was a sweet and perfect dog from the day we got her. I think that you would do really welll with a dachsund. They are mellow and would do well in an apartment.
It is important (I think) to get a puppy. Older dogs that need a home may or may not find a deep place in your heart. A puppy is a labor of love. There is so much to teach them and most are willing students from a young age. An older dog may be set in their ways and honestly, I think the attachment requires a puppy.
I am not ignoring your thoughts on Grandmas dogs. This is sad and I am aware of how you feel. However, if you are going to spend the time, the money and the energy on a dog, it may as well be of your liking. I would get a puppy. As far as rescuing one....any dog you get will be a rescue...because if you do not take it in, somebody will. Any dog that needs a home is a rescue dog.
Maybe later down the road, when you are no longer in an apartment that will require a certain personality in a dog, you can consider rescuing a friend for your puppy?
Personally, I would study up on breeds and get myself a puppy who is a fit for my situation. I think a dachsund would be perfect, but you need to decide.
I suggest a puppy as your first dog. There is no other love more rewarding in the animal world than raising a puppy. I also think it is good spiritual medicine for you and Chris.
Good luck!!!
So funny that you mentioned a dachshund being the perfect dog for us because that's the same breed I have been researching. :) I think you're right! Chris has told me soo many wonderful stories about Midnite and how he was one of his favorite pets.
We have neighbors that have a little brown dachshund and he's absolutely gorgeous and clearly apartment-trained because we never hear anything barking or running around. I honestly can not wait to start looking around -- we're thinking about getting one near Christmas time and I am so excited!
I have been researching breeds, reading magazines and books, as well as watching informative shows on Animal Planet. :) It's so silly how badly I want a puppy -- the urge didn't come along until after Chris and I got our own place. I guess it's just that next step in life for us! Hopefully it'll prepare us for whenever we have kids, haha. :P I just want a dog to love & care for. I am so anxious. :)
As for grandma's dogs.. I will always feel so bad for them but I've been thinking about talking to Grandma about maybe giving them up -- maybe to a family with kids or something. Those poor dogs have not gotten the love they deserve since Bubba and Kelsey were kids. So I'll definitely find a solution besides me having to take them in.
Thank you so much for stopping by, by the way! I love your advice. If any one knew what they were talking about, it'd be you. :) You love dogs! And have some wonderful ones. You're definitely right though.. I am so eager to get a puppy and watch it grow & learn. And it's definitely spiritual medicine! That's another reason why I want a pet so badly.. they're always there for you! :)
I can understand that conflict and irony within you. Your scenario reminds me of a thought-provoking but a rather radical question put forward by my teacher when I was in college, when we were discussion on childbirth, abortion and human rights - should we give priority to local kids when it comes to adoption? Although it's on a whole different level and in a different context as your problem, the conflict is rather similar :/
I know how bad it feels - you wanted a puppy that you can train from the very start and one that you feel comfortable with. One the other hand, you feel guilty for not being able to help the abandoned puppies.
See it a way that will make you feel better - no matter whether you're getting a new one or adopting another puppy from grandma's (or any other animal home or welfare associations), you're making the life of ONE dog a lot better.
Taking the courage to have a pet is not easy - don't let such issues bother you too much. It's already very nice of you to be able to prepare yourself for a pet. I see people who have pets as noble people - people who make life a lot better for animals out there who would have ended up foraging the streets for food and sleeping unprotected, exposed to the elements of the weather :(
Do not hesitate, Trina. Go for the choice that your heart tells you. Don't forget that if you pick a puppy, you'll have to be its owner for the entire length of its life and so it's important to know that you yourself have to be comfortable with the choice of puppy.
Having a pet is already a very selfless act, Trina :) kudos to you and Chris!
"See it a way that will make you feel better - no matter whether you're getting a new one or adopting another puppy from grandma's (or any other animal home or welfare associations), you're making the life of ONE dog a lot better. I love that, thank you. It's so silly that I don't even consider it until it comes from someone else. I thought the same but I kept telling myself that I was wrong.. that it was only an excuse. But you're right, no matter where I get a dog from, I will be making that one individual dog's life a lot better. :) Thank you, Teddy.
You always give such wonderful comments that are filled with great advice, I really appreciate it. Thank you! :)
Aww, it may be selfless but I think I need a dog just as much one needs an owner. :) I'm just in that time of my life where I want to share my love somehow. Much different than a family member or friend or Chris. I think it's just that next step in my life. Plus, I love to teach. I am so eager to watch a puppy grow up and teach it new things. I know it's going to be hard and quite frustrating at times but I'm actually looking forward to the process. And just to have a little puppy to love and care for is so wonderful. I am so anxious. :D
Chris and I decided to wait a little closer towards Christmas time until we get one so we have plenty of time to continue our research. There are so many wonderful shelters around here and actually have plenty of puppies to adopt. So now I am quite happy. :)
I know having two dogs may be a bit much, but have you considered adopting one of the dogs at your grandmothers and buying yourself a puppy? I have never been too fond of dogs myself, I was attacked by one at a young age. I am fond of animals, however, and I believe that they have a right to be cared for as we do.
Oh wow, I am sorry to hear you have been attacked by a dog before. :( That's terrible! I remember when I was young I witnessed this huge dog (must have been over 100-150lbs) attack this little girl who lived near me. It was awful and so scary because I didn't know what to do. Luckily there were adults near by and got the dog away from the girl. I can't remember but I think she was quite hurt.. :(
I'm pretty anxious around large dogs I'm not used to. But I think if you got a young puppy and got to train it, it wouldn't be so bad. :) That's my hopes anyways! I think any dog could be trained to be good.
And I have thought about getting one of my grandmother's dogs but I can't choose between the two, it would be so unfair. And I don't want the other one to be alone (they are mother and son) -- I'm just going to have to come over and play with them sometimes or just try my hardest to find them a better home. Or possibly convince my younger brother (who lives with my grandmother) to get out of the house and play with them!
I get what you mean. There's something different about actually adopting a puppy and watching them grow up. Also, to actually be involved in their growth (training, grooming, walking, taking them to the vet for their first vaccines) forms a bond between the owner and the pet.
However, I've adopted homeless dogs as well. A few months ago, a stray dog (a mixed breed) wandered into our home, and actually had a part in protecting us from burglars. We ended up keeping her and she's still with us now.
Hi, Lexie! That's so wonderful about your dog and how you came upon adopting her. That's so great & very kind of you to take her in like that. I think all my stressing is pointless.. I realized that I'm just going to have to get out there and meet some dogs before I find the one for me. I know there is one out there that's absolutely going to grab a hold of my heart and I'm so very looking forward to caring for one.
If you take on a dog for good reasons that you don't really want, you may end up resenting it even though your heart was in the right place, the dog may not be.
www.dogbreedinfo.com/search.htm is a good place to match you with a dog breed that is suitable for you in your current lifestyle and living quarters.
Miss you guys
Stay in touch
Uncle Scott and Aunt Valerie